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Check out our blog page for party beasts anonymous and hangover survivors!

RECIPE: Basic Bitch On The Beach

Anastasia Masha

Our absolute favourite flavour this summer is anything watermelon (including a bikini print), not to mention that this ingredient can serve as a hangover cure as well! Make a tumblr perfect drink with just 10 easy steps below.

You are welcome:

Basic Bitch On The Beach

1. Buy watermelon.

2. Find a hulk looking male with white teeth to carry watermelon.

3. Insta story hulk with watermelon to make ex jealous. Make sure your beautiful laugh is in it. You are having the time of your life. 

4. Schedule the date with hulk. Say bye to hulk. Put on a bikini & sunnies while jamming mainstream r'n'b. Cut watermelon. 

5. Put the watermelon cubes (precision is not necessary) in the freezer. Call the squad. Decide on Prosecco or Vodka. Or both.

6. Take out watermelon. Slush it to the best ability. Look up 'watermelon cocktail recipe Martha Stewart'.

7. Welcome squad. Do shots of preferred beverage. Make bestie responsible for looking up 'watermelon cocktail recipe Martha Stewart'.

8. Mix watermelon slushy with Prosecco or Vodka. Or both. Add other ingredients to taste. What Martha said. 

9. Pour everything into glass jars to add millennial flare. Or take away coffee mugs.  

10. Take a picture of your hand holding the drink with a beach backdrop (computer screen can do). Day drink with squad. Drunk message hulk. Enjoy.  

This blog post was written by Masha.